All Done (no cheese)

So the show that Rich and I were doing together ended last night. It doesn't destroy me the way it did years ago, maybe it's because I know that it won't be too long before I do another one. Or that I actually continue to go out with my favorite people after the show is over. If you've never been on stage in a play (though I know that most of the people who would read my blog are involved in the theater) its not something that is easy to describe. But I do recommend it, an dbeing in a production doesn't necessarliy mean being on stage. There is always need for someone able to help out backstage. The only thing that really disappoints me is the way last night ended. I guess we just had so much fun on Friday night that it couldn't really compare. It was just sad to see everyone go their seperate ways so quickly after it ended-I mean the UNO tournament only went on the first night, and then the people most involved never stuck around. Ok, so I'm bummed.

We were asked to consider doing another show at the Empire theater but I don't think that I'll be able to. RIGHT before my husband called with that news I recieved a call from my choir director. I enjoy acting, but I have very little confidence in my abilities. Whereas when it comes to singing in a choir I know that I have value. I'm not the best soloist-at least in the sense that I didn't become the operatic singer that my instructors wanted me to. But I know how to blend and support a note which is invaluable in groups. I've only been a member of this choir since around the beginning of March, and I know that no-one is going to throw someone the don't know into a position of responsiblity when they have people they've known for years. So it means a lot to me to be asked to do this, especially since they've hardly seen me this summer, between the break we took (if I'm not supposed to sing it's not easy to get me to church on Sunday morning) and not being able to show up to practice because of rehersals for the show. It surprised me that I was asked at all. Besides, I really miss singing.

But in REALLY good news, Mom took a shower this morning! Yay! I just hope she's also wearing clean clothes. In so many ways I'm really tired of this, it's not fair to any of us, especially her. But there's not really anything we can do. Except maybe try to get her to eat a decent meal once a day. How do you deal with this? I'm just sick and angry-and I don't care if you think being angry is right, or if you think of me as weak for being disgusted by watching her eat, or drink. No one who is not directly involved has a right to judge me. and just because you live here doesn't mean that you understand. I hate this.

No cheese