Kamikaze Clarinet Karaoke

So in the mornings on the way to work I usually Listen to "Shawn & Jeff". And I'm sure that everyone's familiar with the way morning shows try to make up new and exciting ways to give away prizes. A while ago they came up with Kamikaze Clarinet Karaoke. I think that it was inspired by "Hollaback Girl". But anyway, Jeff (I think) is handed a piece of paper with a song written on it, and after a brief warm-up/experimentation trys to play the song on his old clarinet.

This may be one of my favorite games. . .ever.

Having been exposed to an absurd amount of children who "play" the clarinet, (and think it's a good idea to wait till the day before a concert to tell Mom that they need new cork) I have heard more horrid renditions of "A Whole New World" and "The Jurassic Park Theme" than anyone who is not a band teacher deserves. And if you don't want to piss off the proud parent there is no laughing, cringing, or just asking the child to stopfortheloveofallthatsholy! I can tell that the poor man on the other side of the radio must have at one time been reasonably accomplished, because you CAN. . .eventually. . .figure out what he's trying to play off the top of his head. He actually created a very good rendition of "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" and "Lonely No More" , The only downside is that they do the game at random, and that my cell doesn't allow me to call the station (shitnuggets!)

So this morning I tuned in just in time to catch the end of the warm-up. Now the guys involved are laughing throughout the entire segment-and I don't know how you can laugh AND play the clarinet. It started something like
"Ok, for tickets to see Rob Thomas and Anna Nalyck, Name this tune!!"
"Ok, I've got it" (clarinet plays a few notes) Honk! "wait" HONK! "wait" honk! "wait, OK, Ok, Ok NOW I've got it"
this goes on for a bit before he hits his stride-and plays through the chorus a few times. And I have no clue, just a vague sense of familiarity. Neither do the people calling in and guessing. It gets to the point where people are guessing whatever has come to mind, even if it sounds Nothing like what he's trying to play. So after taking a bunch of really stupid calls they finally say,
"Ok, I'll give you guys a big hint, this is for tickets to see ROB THOMAS"
Now the people are giving every song that they can think of involving Rob Thomas (except for some reason, if he sang it with Matchbox Twenty, hmmm) Finally the poor guy howling through the clarinet says
"Hey, What time is it?"
"Why, it's 3AM, Oh, no, it's 7:48"
more clueless calls
"I don't know how I can give you a bigger hint, ROB THOMAS"
"What time is it?"
"3AM, no I'm sorry it's not 3AM, it's 7:51"
a few more clueless calls came in before a very exasperated caller finally got the right answer. they went to commercial, and I guess one of the other guys in the studio claimed that he could do a better likeness while gargling beer. . .so when they came back, one of the DJs had found a
Bud Light. It didn't work out.

I haven't laughed so hard while driving in a long time.