Cheese for everyone!

Ah, cramps. Gotta love 'em. On the bright side it means Rich and I have ducked parenthood for another month. If I had been smart I would have invested in Norplant or something. But Rich thinks I'm insane enough without it. :D

anyway, Fun...


An observant Jew called Jacob finds himself in dire trouble. His business has gone bust and he's in serious financial trouble. He's so desperate that he decides to ask God for help.

He goes into the synagogue and begins to pray: "God, please help me, I've lost my business and if I don't get some money, I'm going to lose my house as well, please let me win the lotto."

Lotto night comes and somebody else wins it. Jacob goes back to the synagogue: "God, please let me win the lotto, I've lost my business, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well."Lotto night comes a second time and Jacob still has no luck! Back to the synagogue again, Jacob asks: "My God, why have you forsaken me? I've lost my business, my house, my car and my wife and my children are starving. I don't often ask you for help and I have always been a good servant to you. Why won't you just let me win the lotto this one time so I can get my life back in order?"

Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light as the heavens open and Jacob is confronted by the voice of God himself:

"JACOB, MEET ME HALF WAY ON THIS ONE....BUY A LOTTO TICKET."



Once there was an old rich man who was afraid of dying and leaving all his wealth behind on earth. So, he took up the matter with God. He pleaded day and night to be able to take all his earthly possessions with him.

Finally, God conceded. He said the man could take as much as he could fit in one suitcase. The old man immediately went out, bought a huge suitcase, sold all he owned and filled the suitcase with gold bars.

Shortly after that, the old man died. Awkwardly dragging the big, heavy suitcase, he approached St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter stopped him, asked him to open his luggage, and then told him he couldn't bring his gold bars into Heaven.The man was irate. "You don't understand," he said. "I got permission directly from God himself for this. He told me whatever I could fit into one suitcase, I could bring with me."

St. Peter, shrugged his shoulders and simply said, "Fine with me. But we've already got plenty of pavement here."

Just goes to show you, nothing has the same value everywhere. I like that idea.


And some wise words from Lucy that I need to keep in mind:


Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.

-Lucille Ball